Feel Guilty? No!

Attention grabber isn’t it?

As a stay at home dad of five kids, or which three have a special need of some kind, I am at the forefront of all activities in our home.  As it should be.  With our youngest son Marc and his increasing need for near constant attention, the pace is increasing.  He requires more and more energy to keep up with him.

As an individual with more than one chronic illness, my health is finite.  The last two months have definitely put a stress on my health.

Denver Capital building

Denver Capital building (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

This week, I left home on Wednesday for two days in Denver doing a Title V Block Grant Review.  More about that can be found here.

Even though it has only been two days, I can say unequivocally that my body hurts less today than it did two days ago.  I like to blame the altitude.  I remember in July when I was in Billings, MT for a 5 day period with my daughter, I felt really good.

So, is it the altitude, or is it the fact that I can relax and not need to keep constantly on-guard for Marc and his behaviors?  Because even when sleeping, one can never fully let down their guard.

So if I feel better simply because I don’t have to be on guard 24/7 with Marc, should I feel guilty that I am here and he is at home with my wife, his aunt as well as the brothers and sisters?

No.  I don’t think so.  I refuse to feel guilty about it.  I didn’t do much except get a hair cut, watch television and sleep.  But how relaxing it was to do those things.

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